Maternal Mental Health
Women with anxiety & depression
Couples preparing for & enduring parenthood
Individual Therapy
Is a collaborative, warm-hearted, compassionate experience between myself and an individual person. I offer an intentional in-person space for those living in Goleta, Santa Barbara, Carpinteria, Montecito area. Telehealth available for people residing in California.
Couple's Therapy
I work with couples preparing for parenthood, parents in the midst of raising young children/teens, and parents who want to develop secure attachment based skills. Together we focus on addressing anxiety, fear, communication patterns, family of origin roots, and attachment patterns. I support couples to grow “relational fitness” (active listening, empathy, healthy connections) to strengthen the parental relationship, so that you can show up with confidence and presence for your children.
Mother's Group
In an unhurried way, we will unpack ideals and beliefs of motherhood, slow down anxious thoughts, practice compassionate inner self-talk, and learn to help balance the invisible “mother load”. Weekly fee is $55. Call (805) 617-3816 to inquire about next group date.
Welcome, I’m Mary
(she/her/hers)
I am a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (#119679) in Santa Barbara, CA. With over 10 years experience as a psychotherapist, I continue to feel honored and grateful to be with people in a heart-centered way. I received my Masters in Counseling Psychology with emphasis in Marriage Family Therapy, Professional Clinical Counseling and Depth Psychotherapy from Pacifica Graduate Institute (Carpinteria, CA). The heart of my work focuses on helping mother’s feel supported during Matrescence if this word is new to you, it means “the process of becoming a mother, encompassing the profound physical, psychological, social, and emotional changes a woman experiences during pregnancy, childbirth, and the postpartum period”. Additionally, I am passionate about working with women to transform their anxiety/depression into inner trust as well as helping couples prepare for and endure parenthood. I live on the Barberenos Chumash peoples land, now called, Santa Barbara in CA, with my husband and two young children. My gratitude for this beautiful place comes from a deep respect and love for nature. I spend my time out on a trail, walk, or squishing my toes in the sand.
Something unique about my therapeutic style comes from many years of training in-person in large group format with the renowned Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estes Reyes (Jungian Psychoanalyst). I am initiated into what Dr. Estes calls Curanderismo (healing) ways. I am experienced in these healing ways to help my clients reclaim their ancestry (original ways of knowing), listen to night dreams, understand our story is medicine, attune to one’s instincts and intuition (for many this is learning to trust inner resources for knowing), to grow consciousness, to resist overculture’s denial of experience and attend to our lived experience.
Given our current times where we are observing and experiencing cruel, violent, abusive, and oppressive harm caused by systemic-cultural-colonized practices, I am dedicated to decolonizing the ways I work, think, and learn in private practice. I recognize through Dr. Jennifer Mullan’s work Decolonizing Therapy, who states that “therapy is inherently political and calls for clinicians to address the roots of mental health oppression by centering colonial and historical trauma”. My offering as a mental health provider is to confront Eurocentric models of care that fail to acknowledge the origin of suffering caused by systems of oppression.
Areas of Focus
Complex Post Traumatic Stress
Anxiety
Birth trauma, Birth Story, VBAC informed
Matrescence
Imposter Syndrome
Depression
Challenges in Parenting
Couples Conflicts
Perinatal/Postpartum
Perfectionism
Isolation & Loneliness
Preparing for parenthood
OCD
Neurodivergence
Specializing in Women's Psychological wellbeing
I specialize in helping women in their 20’s, 30’s and 40’s who struggle with: anxiety, depression, and perinatal/postpartum care. I am passionate about advocating for women’s mental health and recognize the many challenges of living in a culture that values individualism, burn-out, and women as accommodators/people-pleasers. Women I work with often describe themselves as high-achievers, perfectionistic, people pleasers, “good-girls”, not-good-enough, and experience a low self-worth. Through a trauma-informed lens and with whole-hearted compassion, I support women to align with their inner knowing, which is often a practice of learning to go inward and resist looking outward for validation. In my 10 years of experience, I have found that when women reclaim their inner knowing, they find balance, centeredness, and confidence about who they are in the world. Together we call in the archetypes of the Sovereign Queen, Wild Woman, and the Restful Woman.
– Understand how old were you when you lost your ability to use your voice
– Discern what your inner knowing sounds like/looks like/feels like through ritual, art, music, poetry, image, and dreams
– Develop trust with your intuition
– Practice being with emotions, rather than trying to “regulate/control” them…so if you feel rage over all the deplorable things happening in the world right now, especially violence against women and girls, then you are a human being expressing an appropriate response. Let our rage be our greatest teacher
– Slow way down, let your breath be restful, unravel ruminating thought cycles, understand your attachment patterns
– Develop an embodied presence and deepen your trust in yourself
– Work with introjects to free up our truest self (introjects are given to us by the culture, family, friends, systems of oppression, misogyny)
– Grow your inner voice that symbolizes your wildest and authentic self
My Approach
Is gentle, sincere, relational, and deeply compassionate. I believe that people heal through attunement, safety, and understanding their attachment patterns in relationships. As a psychodynamic oriented therapist, the modalities that I lean into the most are Depth, Jungian, Attachment, Somatic therapy, and Liberation Psychology. When I am with clients I offer my full presence, not simply being listened to, but also being seen, addressing both the symptoms and the root system that grows beneath.
The sculpture is called “El Esfuerzo” (The Effort) also known as “La Carga” (The Burden) by artist Jaume Plensa located in Barcelona, Spain. The sculpture represents the invisible labor often done by women/full time caregivers, the symbolism recognizes the silent emotional and physical toll this work takes on women and illuminates the imbalance and undervalued responsibilities of caregiving that go unseen.